Girlvert by Ashley Blue

Gosh, nothing I could possibly say could express my feelings about this book. It is the most fantastic, heart breaking, disturbing, wonderful thing I have read in years! I have very few books I call favorites...Candy by Luke Davis, Requiem For a Dream by Hubert Selby Jr, and now Girlvert by Ashley Blue. Who would have thought that a hardcore porn star could write something so beautiful, and soul touching? It is wonderful!!!

I relate to a lot of the statements she makes about not being able to tell people no, and there for being pressured to do things she doesn't want to, because of that inability. I have been in that situation so many times and like her people know of that weakness/inability and use it to their advantage.

I also can understand the feeling of pain she felt from having an addict parent. She was raised in a situation similar to a few ex boyfriends of mine, and I had to suffer their mothers who were just the worse. I would see the harm they would cause in their children lives and I just felt for her!!

Her boyfriend, he was a real piece of work, using her love for him against him to get his way, and the porn they were doing to guilt her into doing something. I know men like that and it is awful and she was so young and naive and in love and on drugs that she couldn't see what he was doing, and boy have a been there. Doing for men things I didn't want to, because if not then they wouldn't love me anymore. (They never really did)

Then the porn stories, like her experience with Khan Tusion nearly choking her to death, and then her gang bang that was just to much for her body to take, causing her to faint later at Whole Foods!! Eating cum from 8 guys one by one with a cold spoon and having to hold it all in her mouth, her details sometimes make you want to get sick for her, that is how good this book is! This book makes you want to puke, get angry, cry, and hug her. I've also felt the need to google certain videos, and I have even felt the desire to try odd things, like sticking my hand down my throat. I also kind of want to try to fist my pussy, since she was able to fist her own ass. But really I have never read a book that make me feel so many feels, most bring anger and tears but no more then that! This book brings makes you feel all the feelings of human emotion. I am not one who feels compassion or empathy. But boy this book made me feel those, feelings I never thought I was capable of feeling!

Just reading her story made me think, just wow! She has been thru and suffered everything, and she is still so happy and amazing. This woman is just the most fantastic human being, when you watch her in interviews!!! She has been thru so much, but she doesn't blame any one, she doesn't talk shit or hate the industry or the bad people who had harmed her. She is just amazing!

I will recommend this book to everyone!